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September 6, 2006
The Shortest Chess Game In The World or How Karl Rove Will Fuck Us In The Bum, One Last, Sweet Time
The chess game**
1) Black Move, Pawn to A2: The Rumsfeld "appeasement" speech angered many people who were shocked that the Defense Secretary would say such a thing. These people have no idea how bad the well is poisoned. Is it that astonishing that Rumsfeld thinks of us that way? Or that he would paint such a black and white picture?
But it was a perfect move for the base. Bush cannot say such things. His megaphone is too big. Rumsfeld has so much job security, St. Peter at the gate envies it. He won't get fired, can't get fired. He can only resign and he cannot concieve of that. So he can be tactically used to rile up the base and if he upsets the mainstream, who cares? Nobody likes him anyway, besides the 32% stalwarts.
2) White Move, Pawn to C2: Finally, the Democrats make a move that's not so fucking stupid you want to join the Green party. Calling for censure (pussies) of Rumsfeld is just angry enough not to be too angry for the unwashed masses and it calls the GOP out. It's high noon, except the GOP has their shotguns and the Dems have Super Soakers. No matter; we had nothing to lose.
Eyes and ears and gooey things between said ears make it impossible to deny that Iraq is going badly. And that's saying it in the most polite terms I've heard in a year. If they had had their vote, Dems would have had GOPers on record with a vote of confidence for Rumsfeld, which would have cost them in November. Or the GOP would have to say Rummy's doing a bad job. Smart move.
3) Black Move, Knight to B4: As Jon Stewart says, they're going to get "all 9-11 up in this bitch." Only the 9-11 bitch may have retired her Pradas by now... who knows? The electorate has mood swings. The electorate makes you wait months until it's ready to make up it's mind. The electorate, in fact, is the bitch in this situation.
But I've lost my point. Shoving 9-11 up our ass has worked before. Now, ABC is going to air a docu-drama that lays the blame at Clinton's feet. I'm not going to absolve Clinton of anything, because I don't know enough to comment on what he did or did not do. I have not read the report from the 9-11 commission. (It is strange that ABC is denying Clinton access to the film, but Rush Limbaugh is apparently allowed an advance copy.)
This is wise of the GOP. Wise... it's fucking brilliant. Soon, they'll figure out a way to blame Katrina, the lack of immigration reform, Iraq, Abu Gharib, Gitmo and the DeLay scandals on Clinton. You apparently can teach a dog new tricks ("cut and run", "fight them there so we don't have to fight them here") but they will come back to their old tricks when stuck in a jam. Blame Clinton, blame Clinton, blame Clinton.
4) White Move, Back to Beginning: The most evil move of all, though, came today. Bush has moved some of the worst of the terror suspect to Gitmo, meaning Hamden applies to them, meaning its "pass my framework for a legal system for these guys or they'll walk free".... "allow torture or evil-doers go free". So the Dems either give Bush a legislative victory (and sully our nation and our legal traditions) or they'll look... yes, say it with me... WEAK ON NATIONAL DEFENSE. Well, I'd rather be a pussy than a sadist or running a gulag. But this won't fly with the majority. They don't care about our legal traditions.
They want to feel safe and the true fact that we will never be safe won't help the Dems. The real world has always been a scary place and one of the worst parts of naming this... thing "war on terror" is that people are convinced we can end evil and terror. (Thank you, neo-cons.) Well, suck it up. We can't. We can get the people who mastermined 9-11, we can shake and bake the Middle East until it's smoldering and bloody, but we can't stop evil. It's always been there.
Game over. We aren't going to get back the House, kids. Not yet. The GOP will retain the House and the Senate. The threat of terrorism is serious and even though this political party hasn't done (at all) what needed to be done, fear will keep their inept asses in Congress.
(However, if this story out of Pakistan (a truce calls for Pakistani troops to leave where Bin Laden supposedly is) catches fire, it may help the Dems.)
**I don't know how to play chess. I'm sorry if the movements and pieces are all wrong.
Posted by emily at September 6, 2006 11:04 PM
Comments
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