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March 20, 2005
Getting Me An Edu-ma-cation
I passed bartending college. I only had to read 100 pages of Kant and, no, the Bloody Mary receipe wasn't on the test. I made twelve drinks in seven minutes and got a 96% on my final exam. I'm ready for the world.
I also received a 158 on my LSAT. According to my mother, this is very good, but I'm a bit disappointed. I'm only in the 77th percentile. Maybe its the whole "high school brainwashing", but isn't 77% a C? No, silly, I know it means I did better then 77% of the other test takers. But I should have done better than 100% of them ass-holes. You know what I'm saying? One person, where I was taking it, didn't comprehend the many warnings we were given beforehand and had on him an electronic device that beeped. No beeping during the LSAT!
I've gotten mailings now from Baylor College, Hofstra and Ave Maria in Ann Arbor has offered me a bit of money. But I cannot attend Tom Monahan's school. Is it the Schubert "Ave Maria" or the Holst? Is it mushrooms or extra cheese?
Choices we make in laugh haunt us. I'll have a Dirty White Mother on the rocks. Bucket glass, 1 1/2 oz brandy, 1/2 oz Kahlua, filled with cream.
96% percent baby! Or 77th percentile.
Posted by emily at March 20, 2005 4:38 PM